Ump'n Around: Now THIS is an Official Gaffe

You owe me a cold one, Mr. Joyce.

ANAHEIM, Calif. -- In the two-man umpiring system...the one you see in most minor-league and high school games...it often feels like baseball is the fastest game on Earth. How could a game that looks so simple, that you've spent thousands of hours watching and a few hundred playing all of a sudden look so foreign; you're like a tourist trying to score breakfast with only"Kornokova" and "EZ Russian for Dummies" to guide you through a quick-talking and impatient shopkeep while two dozen glaring eyes burn you for holding up the line.

Why? Because in two-man, your positioning is the most important thing on your mind. Whatever happens, you have a responsibility for a part of the field and the added responsibility of getting your posterior to a certain piece of real estate. And everything changes depending on the hit, a guy on first, a guy on third, a guy on first and third...at times, you're so happy you hit your spot and claimed your field that you forget to even pay attention to the call you were supposed to be making (cough, cough).

Sure, after a while it becomes natural for the pros. And in the Majors, you even get two more dudes to help out. But positioning and responsibilities remain the first priority for umpires once a ball is in play.

Tonight's Angels-Tigers game provided an example of why this is so...an example of an extremely rare occurence that the MLB umps warned us campers about to no end...don't make a call that isn't yours. If you're at third, don't call a guy safe at first. If you're at second, don't call a play at the plate.

These are obvious, but on the lines, it can get tricky. Balls down the lines are the Home Plate umps call to the base, then they transfer to the baseline ump. Several times at camp we'd get caught excitedly calling a ball fair or foul down the line when the call belonged to our partner. No big deal...so I called it fair before he did. So what?

Quothe the Instructors:

"That's great...until you're at a ballpark full of fans and you've got your arms up because you saw it foul and about 10,000 people start screaming and you look over and see your partner calling it fair. That's not a situation you want to be in."

This grounder went beyond 3rd, and the call belonged to Ump Fav Tim Tschida (4). He called it fair and Detroit's 3B easily threw the runner out. But...uh oh.

"Looks like a dammed Village People concert out there!" -- Possible Clever Comment From Leyland

Home Plate Ump Jim Joyce (66) saw it differently, much to the upset of James Leyland. To his credit, Tschida took it like a pro and managed to exhibit only a mild look of annoyance having been shown up by his partner (see top photo...classic!). Fortunately for everyone, the batter was out two pitches later and all was peaceful in baseball land. But if he had hit a dinger and started a rally. Mama Mia! Like I said, THIS is a real error of officiating and because these guys are so gulldang good, it is extremely rare to see.


POSTSCRIPT: True to form, the announcers brought up instant replay on this play, though not terribly passionately as they were the Angels team. "These kind of plays might one day be up for review," one talker said.

No it wouldn't. Once a foul signal is given, the play is dead. There would be no fair way of overturning the call. And replay is stupid anyway.

new depths

while you guys debate the future of baseball, i've gotten to the bottom of a bigger story.

Fair Ball: A Fan's Case for No Replays

Inspired by Craigory Schmidt, here we go...

(Executive Summary: MLB should fix the bizarre set-up of ballpark fences/foul poles instead of falling into a trend of adopting replay technology that only adds to the controversy and takes away from the game itself.)

If anyone here watched the Lakers/Spurs Game 4 on TNT just a few minutes ago, the case not only against replay but against this obsession of TV and Radio to nitpick calls speaks for itself. Long story short, the Lakers won by two...the last play involved contact between Derek Fisher (laker) and Brent Barry (Spur) that could have, but was not called a foul.

As the game ended, Doug Collins of the TNT crew spoke of nothing but the non-call. On the LAKERS broadcast, there was little discussion of much else. The post-game on TNT was about nothing but the non-call.

So you'd imagine the Spurs players and coaches would be livid given such a controversial call.

Pop: "If I were the ref, I wouldn't make that call."
Duncan: "They're not going to make that call."
Barry: "No. That isn't going to get called."

So if the OTHER TEAM doesn't even care, where exactly is the controversy? In the fan's minds, that's where...thanks to the laziness of the telecasters, who in lieu of actual analysis, look to stir up the emotions of the still-raw fans. Why? So they'll watch the post-game! Call in and talk about it! Indeed, Lakers fans had already come up with their arsenal of "bad calls" that hurt their team through the game. It's a bunch of garbage that has nothing to do with who won and why. Dissecting a professional game in any sport is hard. It requires a lot of thought, caution and professionalism. Putting a last minute call into question is much easier. (and more sexy, because any boob with an opinion can play this game.)

POINT #1 -- Replay solves nothing. Controversy will always exist because it is easy pickings for analysts.

Evidence: Are there fewer arguments over calls in College Football or NFL these days?

Unfortunately, the discussions of calls are put in dire terms by play-by-play teams, when they often have a loose if not outright incorrect understanding of the rules. The strike zone, for instance, is not a static area...it is a changing shape determined by the stance of the batter. A catch isn't a catch until the ball is successfully transfered out of the glove. Doubtful many fans or announcers could put these concepts to words or practice. That doesn't stop them from trying to make snap judgements about whether a call was right or not (I've never heard an announcer say, "You know, I don't really know that how that rule goes.") NOTE: The great announcers didn't and don't waste much time with this nonsense. They would just say, "That's a close call at first" or similar.

Which leads to point #2:

Point #2: The real issues is no one understands the rules beyond the officials.
Evidence: Did you watch ESPN's saturation coverage of all these "blown" HR calls?

ESPN's Sunday Night Baseball featuring the Mets v. Yankees was the starting point for this current rush to install replay in MLB. A deep fly ball to left tailed out near the foul pole, took a wicked turn off something and went into the crowd. At least 20 replays of this ball were shown in the next hour, with neither announcer noticing the ball actually hit the top of the wall before hitting the corner of the foul pole (which was strangely painted black at the bottom in Yankee Stadium). So the 3rd Base ump called it right as a HR, but asked for backup. The three others thought it was foul, so he changed his call. The Mets won by like 10, but that didn't stop ESPN from acting like this was the biggest mistake in the history of professional officiating.

Would replay have solved this? Maybe. But attention would then only turn to calls at first, plays at the plate, borderline catches, etc. A HR barely getting over the wall or being foul or being a double is really no more or less important than a close third strike call with two outs. So who cares? This solves nothing. ESPN will still focus on stirring up controversy and the replay will solve none of it.

The week following, each SportsCenter featured a BRAND NEW controversial HR call or non-call. The funny thing is, I watched them all and honestly couldn't call 80 percent of them. I don't know the ground rules for those stadiums. Sometimes the wall is in, sometimes not, sometimes the line is on top of the wall, sometimes three inches under, sometimes above the wall.

I know this might sound a bit, uh, logical, but if what you're really after is clear HR calls...FIX THE STUPID WALLS SO THE BOUNDARIES ARE CLEAR. Each stadium -- especially these new ones -- has some jacked up outfield boundaries to give the place personality, while at the same time compromising clarity as to what is or is not in play. Seems to me, you could pretty easily paint a line of yellow atop all walls, and push any structures that are out-of-play further back from the in-play area to prevent this. This is the Big Leagues. It's like if in the NBA you had the shot clock in a different position and a bunch of stairs perched atop the backboard in Phoenix, but then a restaurant behind the glass in NY. It's silly. Push that garbage back 5 feet and this would never come up again. Put a little netting basket along each wall if you like. And as for the foul pole...these calls get made correctly all the time. This one at Yankee Stadium is a direct result of the bizarre wall set-up, where the wall comes in three feet ahead of the foul pole, which is also strangely painted black at the bottom, unlike the rest of it.

Or, we could just waste time and energy instituting a new replay system that will only lead to more nitpicking of calls and ultimately slow the game down to a bareknuckled crawl...all to feed the addiction of the ESPN generation, which will spend days and days arguing about whether a play was called correctly or not -- yet never actually understanding the rules they are so adamently debating. This is not a solution to anything...just ask the NFL, or watch a College Football game with the ESPN crew and honestly tell me replay has helped the game.

There's No Replay In Baseball

At least...not yet. I'm sure most could guess where I come down on this story.

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=3408154

The Incredible Shrinking Gagne

This is a photographic representation of Gagne's career...

2004

2008

Legend: One is considerably smaller, less interesting and looking to be over...

Lotsa Goodness in Tigs v. Diamondbacks -- Bunts, Rules and Jonesy

If the Tigers are a legitmate contender, their performance in Phoenix might just be the first evidence we've seen. The Diamondbacks are the real deal so far this season, and the Tigs have played them very strong for two straight. Losing a squeaker yesterday and winning their first "solid" game I've seen. 3-2. Well done.

In fact, this was their first win in over 40 games when they've scored 3 or less.

Better than this, however, was a rules quirk I learned today about bunters. In the 8th Inning, the Diamondbacks got Stephen Drew on as the leadoff guy. Hudson then came up to bunt him into scoring position. On a 2-1 count, Hudson pops up the bunt. Pudge lets it drop and the Tigs ended up with a double play. (See pics below)

Pudge lets the pop drop...as Hudson stews at his mistake.

...and picks off Drew who was in a pickle at first to start the 2-4-3 DP.

Turns out, a batter attempting a bunt loses the protection of the infield fly rule. I've seen a lot of popped up bunts, but never saw this. And I certainly didn't know the rule, making my decision to leave the gray pants in the closet a wise one. So many awesome rules!

Better yet, Todd "The Cooler" Jones came in, hit the leadoff guy in the 9th and had his usual high-wire act ending up getting the final out in Maggs glove on the right field warning track. Which inspired this celebration on his part, paying homage to his teammates who have started wearing high socks as a "team" thing. Jones reports he doesn't own a pair of high socks. (Yes, those are NBA logo socks)



It's been a long journey to get here. It started poorly back in '01. Not a big fan. And it wasn't great in '06. Then at some point in the postseason, with a playoff game against the A's in the balance -- bases loaded with the Big Hurt batting -- I realized he is perhaps the most even keeled baller I've ever witnessed. Last year, after giving up two runs and loading them up with the game on the line, he got the last out and did a mock "fade-away jumper" pose. This year, he's just taking his shirt out the moment the game is over. Yes, we've had our moments. But now, so many years later, I love Todd Jones.

George Sherrill's Shelf-Like Cap Bill Demands Your Attention

Not sure if any of you have seen ex-Mariner George Sherrill closing for the Orioles this year. Gaines and I caught him in action a few nights ago. He's a terrific pitcher, but that's not the subject of this post; more remarkable than any of his pitches is his lid. We've seen certain guys wear their caps flat in the past, managers especially. But Georgie takes it to a whole new level. According to his statements to the press, he simply wears it exactly as it is when they hand it to him. But honestly, it looks like he either irons it with a ton of starch or, perhaps, has replaced the standard bill with one made of plywood. It's deep! I hope the always entertaining Uni Watch tackles this hot topic soon. The above picture doesn't really do it justice, so tune in and watch Sherrill pitch.

Tiger Batters Have No Clue Which End Is Up

I hope Mr. Ilitch sells a whole lotta pizzas because at this point he will need to make up for his piss poor investment that everyone under the sun thought was a sure thing.

They were slapped tonight by a triple A baseball team that should have been contracted 5 years ago. Edgar Renteria still thinks he is the World Series hero from over 10 years ago when all he needed to do was throw the ball to first instead of a flashy pitch in the middle of the diamond that allowed the winning run to score. Curtis Granderson whiffs like he's never seen an off speed pitch before. And a better than quality start by Nate Robertson was wasted.

I know it is May 13, but for the first time I am feeling a shred of doubt. I wonder if Leyland can spare any extra heaters these days.

Quartermark: Hud's List of Thinkie

1. Andruw Jones is pretty much living up to my "hunch". I still wouldn't have guessed he'd be 70 pounds heavier than his rookie year.

2. Tigers being a really bad team is stunning. Lots of folks are acting as though this somehow makes sense (read Lynn Henning's case for starting pitching being the culprit and suggesting the Tigs may not be much better than a .500 team). The only reason this isn't #1 is that I've had time to digest it. I'd argue there is no explanation for this team...it just isn't reasonable for them to be losing at every chance they get -- if you just watched E. Renteria put the go-ahead run across for the Royals with an error tonight, you know what I mean. It has nothing to do with talent, tough-luck or any of that. It has to do with a lack of presence of mind in key situations (at bats, defense, pre-game prep) that stems from a failure of leadership. At this point, the Detroit Tigers are worse together than they would be apart. They are a failing team.

3. Marlins -- These guys are fun to watch! Maybe management will figure out a way to rip this team's heart out before the All-Star Break?

4. Boston is gull-dang good.

5. Even T. Hunter hasn't made me enjoy the Angels. The OC can tug a horse for all I care.

HOLY COW

Rick Ankiel might have forgotten how to pitch, but he can still throw strikes. Good Lord:

Saw This One Coming: Jim Edmonds Cut Loose

When not frat-boying with the bar crowd, the Padres' Jim Edmonds has been spending his 2008 muffing fly balls and striking out a whole bunch. After sitting a game, pinch-hitting into a ground out after a double-switch, apparently Bud Black & Co. had seen enough.

It was strange watching Edmonds (the bane of Edmunds.com's existence, BTW) this year. I knew he had annoyed the Cardinals to the point of being let go, if I'm remembering correctly. But I definitely remembered that unbelievable knack for catching balls hit over his head or out of reach BEHIND him in the outfield. He really was automatic on those. And his bat was pretty impressive, too, standing for a time as one of the power threats of the Pujol's Era St. Lunatics.

But, it just didn't happen this year. I chalked it up early to playing Center in such a massive ballpark, but I guess it just wasn't too be. Adios, Jim. You made some of the best catches I've ever seen.

Darn You Boys: Why DET Sucks to Watch

The Year of 1,000 Excuses?

There's no beating around the bush on this one...I hate watching the Tigers play so far in 2008. In fact, you might say I haven't found this level discomfort on my couch with the Olde English "D" on the screen since the horror of 2003. There's some magic, but there's more phoned-in effort than is statistically possible. Errors are losing games. Starting pitching offers a quality start once every 9 games or so. Worst of all, the 2007 team was shut out 3 times. I'm pretty sure this team has close to 5 or 6 already...and MLB pitching has not improved quite that much in the off-season.

It is important to note that being schitzo is a Tiger tradition dating back to the Magical Season of 2006, when the same team that dominated the Majors from April to July took a gigantic flop to end the year, dropping a series against the awful KC Royals at home to eventually lose first place in their division on the very last day of the season. And last year, the Tigs played great and flubbed down the stretch and against division rivals to miss a return trip to the post-season. And despite all this, I enjoyed watching the Tigers more than ever. (I also love watching the Dodgers, despite similar underachieving fates in a few recent seasons.)

So what's different this year? That would be a payroll of $130 million, a lineup of three or more Hall of Famers, darn-near double digits of All-Stars and a preseason swagger worthy of the Bronx Bombers.

Who knows what will happen. But the scrappy, loveable Tigs are getting perilously close to turning in a pathetic, Country Club-type season of elitist moping. They're not just underachievers, they're starting to look like wimps. And that is something that just won't fly in Motown...or in Glendale, where I chose to spend my Extra Innings feed elsewhere.

A Great Day for Title Town

Yes, as silly as it is for a locality to claim it is somehow better than another at professional sports...this was a great day for Detroit.

• The Tigs swept the Yankees @ the Stadium for the first time since 1966
• The Pistons crushed the Sixers to advance in the NBA Playoffs
• Least...but not if you were around in the 90s...the Red Wings CRUSHED the Avs, 8-2, to complete a Stanley Cup Playoff sweep

This is off-topic, but it does relate. Baseball is my biggest sport...by far. The Tigers are my biggest team. However, as far as teams that I despise...none (even the University of Michigan football team) can approach the bizarre loathing I hold to this very day toward the Colorado Avalanche because of the rivalry sparked by Claude Lemieux's hit on Kris Draper that nearly killed ol' Drapes.

I don't give two rips about hockey these days (I was a modest fan even at my heights). But there's no team I like to see beaten more than the Avs. For a quick refresher course (or for those newbies, a short course) watch the following few minutes of YouTubes. For the one with the Filter song, I apologize as it is a bit overwraught...but if you were watching back from the D in the late-90s, you'll probably still get chills from the 1997 Easter Massacre footage as CL gets beaten, Darren McCarty seals his status as local hero, Patrick Roy and Mike Vernon...goalies...square off, and pints and pints of Colorado's finest are collected on the Ice of Joe Louis. (And the Wings pinched 'em later that year in the Playoffs 4-2...hee hee!)

Motown!


Why Detroit Hates the Avs (:30 to 1:25)

Lemieux, a known cheap-shot artist, nearly kills Kris Draper by blind-siding him into the sill of his bench...earning him a suspension



The Full, Uncut 7 Minutes (if you really like the nuance)

Some 300 days later, the Wings had waited until the Avs were on their home ice to exact revenge upon Lemieux & Co. Claude gets knocked nearly unconscious by Darren McCarty and requires assistance off the ice. The goalies end up fighting along with Shanny, Malts and nearly everyone else.



The "Easter Massacre" of '97...to Music (So Best! 1:38 to 2:20 stand up there with any championship moment in most Detroiters minds)

Same thing, but showing that the Red Wings fans are metal nerds. I still like watching it, tho. You get to see McCarty also take down Adam Deadmarsh...and then score the winning goal in OT on Roy. Oh baby!