If Hud ran baseball. . .

This is how short Guillen's leash would be.
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For real, this is what he had to say before Saturday's game. It's real, and it's spectacular.
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Damn you, Tigers, for taking Neifi Perez off the Cubs' hands. He's 33, going to cost you $3 million next year, and Pudge probably fields 2nd base better. Although if everything follows form he will probably hit 25 homers and lead the league in steals once he peels off the Cubbie blue.